Two things. First thing: I am disillusioned. Never have I ever heard this bit of information passed on to me today, leaving me shell-shocked. Apparently, sometime over the past 10 years or so, it has become unnecessary, perhaps even frowned upon, to include two spaces following a period. As an English minor, I've typed my share of papers over the years, and have obviously wasted a few trees in the process with all of my freakish spaces taking up the page. It is a habit that is hard to break; even this post is double-spaced after periods. I was lucky to have a great English teacher in high school, and a number of great English professors in college, and I ain't never heard of no single space after a period. Never.
Second thing: I am disgusted. I brought a bologna (baloney, as preferred by some) sandwich for lunch today. Bologna is a lunch meat which, like pepperoni or hot dogs, is best not pondered or analyzed- it is what it is. However, its general sliminess has put me off since childhood. A few days ago, I saw this Oscar Mayer mystery while on a desperate grocery mission. "Eww, bologna," was my first thought, followed by a quick, "Mmmm, bologna." The latter thought won out, possibly due to my cold meds coupled with my apartment's extreme lack of food. I bought that package of bologna. I guess I was feeling rambunctious today, because as I was eating, I started to contemplate. The package said "Made from chicken and pork." Ok, I can deal with that, though typically, I don't like to mix meats. I guess what was bothering me was the gelatin-like quality of the bologna. Meat should not exhibit qualities of jello. The worst part, however, is that every once in awhile, while chewing the bologna, you crunch on a little something. Something of a different texture, something that has been ground down till barely noticeable in the jelly meat, something like....hoof, perhaps?
Sick.
I still finished the sandwich.
